


Take It All, But Not My Love

by WithTheKeyIsKing



Category: James Bond - All Media Types, SPECTRE (2015)
Genre: Amnesia, Brain Damage, M/M, Memory Loss, Protective James Bond, Torture
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-26
Updated: 2015-11-26
Packaged: 2018-05-02 22:22:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,563
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5265920
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WithTheKeyIsKing/pseuds/WithTheKeyIsKing
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"You know, I thought about doing this to you, and I thought about doing it to Dr. Swann. But then I realized - hurting you would not compare to hurting the one you love. And though you put up a good show, Dr. Swann isn't the one you love. He is."</p>
            </blockquote>





	Take It All, But Not My Love

Bond is kneeling at Oberhauser's feet, staring at Madeleine while the sound of her father's suicide plays in the background. She is looking back at him, green eyes shining with unshed tears, face twisted in thinly veiled pain.

Oberhauser simply looks down at James shaking his head ever so slightly in what seems to be disappointment. Bond can hear someone walk up behind him, but he doesn't have time to look before something metal _a_ _gun,_ his mind suppliesslams against his skull, sending him into darkness.

When James wakes up, he's sitting in a chair, his hands tied behind his back, his ankles tied to the legs of the chair. His head hangs limp against his chest, and he forces himself not to groan at the pain at the back of his skull; he's sure that he's bleeding from the hit, but that's not the most vital thing to focus on at the moment.

Slowly James raises his head, blinks a few times to adjust to the bright white lights, and then looks around. To his right is Oberhauser, sitting at a computer and tapping away at it. One of the walls of the room is glass, a bunch of floor-length windows, which overlooks some of the compound. The other three wallsand the ceiling, and the floorare all white.

And sitting just a few feet in front of him is Q.

The Double-O agent feels a brief flash of fear, but suppresses it quickly. Fear, right now, will do him no good. Over all, Q looks fairly unharmed. There's a small gash on his foreheadwas probably wacked over the head by some thug, Bond thinks angrilybut no other visible injuries. His eyes are closed at the moment, his body relaxed, probably still unconscious. He's sitting in a strange chair, almost like something you'd see in a dentist's office. His feet are buckled to the leg-parts of the chair with metal bands, his wrists similarly restrained. There's a band across his forehead as well.

In the back of his mind, James wonders how Q could possibly be there. When they'd met in Austria the young Quartermaster had been shaken, but unhurt. He was supposed to have gotten on a plane back to England. What had happened? How had they caught him?

Bond tugs against his own restraints, testing them. They hold very well. The sound of his movement alerts Oberhauser to the fact that he's awake, and the man turns in his swivel chair to look at James, smiling in what could be considered a polite manner if they were in different circumstances.

"Ah, James, you're awake! Very good. Our other guest-" he nods towards Q, "-is not, obviously, but he was hit rather hard. I think the sedative we used to keep him under should be wearing off within the minute." Just as he says this, Q's head shifts slightly, his nose scrunching up in that adorable way James has always loved. "See! There he is."

Q's eyes flutter open, and he makes a small sound of pain, which makes James's gut clench painfully. Oberhauser simply smiles as Q glances around helplessly. When the Quartermaster's eyes finally land on Bond, James barely resists cursing. Q has had basic training about hiding his emotionsevery MI6 agent has to have basic trainingbut he's still high off of the sedative, and so his reactions are there for everyone to see. The relief he exudes when he sees James sitting there is quite obvious, and Oberhauser drinks it right up.

"Now, isn't that cute," Oberhauser says in that sickly-sweet way of his. He glanced at Bond. "You know, James, you'd almost managed to convince me. That you loved Dr. Swann, I mean. They way you protected her and tried to shield her from her father's death...well, it was touching. Truly. But I've been watching you and the people around you for _quite_ some time, my boy. So I could see it, the lingering glances between you and your Quartermaster, the fleeting touches when no one was looking, the late night visits to each other."

Bond simply rolls his eyes. "Oh please, I don't cradle rob. I have no interest in being with someone so much younger than me."

Oberhauser laughs. _Laughs!_ "Oh, James, do not lie to me. It will not do you any good, anyway. I will still hurt your beloved Q, no matter what you say." The man turns and looks back at his computer, pushing a few buttons. Suddenly Q's contraption-of-a-chair leaned back a bit more, the parts holding his wrists moving behind the chair's back. Q's breath quickens and his eyes seek out Bond desperately. James stares back resolutely, sending all the support he can from five feet away.

"You know, I thought about doing this to you, and I thought about doing it to Dr. Swann. But then I realizedhurting you would not compare to hurting the one you love. And you truly love him," Oberhauser's tone is conversational, and he pushes a few more buttons on his computer.

Something extends out of the back of the chair, coming around to Q's right side. Q eyes it warily, clearly trying to control his breathing, but he's never been in a situation like this before. A thin little drill comes out of the end of the metal extension, and Bond can feel his heart accelerate. "This first probe will affect sight, hearing, and balance."

Q screams as the drill digs into the area behind his ear, and rage boils in James's veins. He will kill Oberhauser if it's the last thing he does.

The drill retracts after what feels like forever, and Q slumps in his restraints, panting heavily. His eyes are glassy and vague, still lost in the intense pain he just went through.

"Q," James says sternly, unable to help himself from offering support. "Q, look at me." When the Quartermaster does, James smiles slightly. He hates that he's showing Oberhauser how much Q means to him, but Q needs him right now. "You're ok, Q, you're ok."

Q nods weakly and tries to smile back, but he's still pretty out of it.

"A man lives inside his headthat's where the seed of his soul is," Oberhauser begins. "James and I were both present recently when a man was deprived of his eyes and the most astonishing thing happened, didn't you notice? He wasn't there anymore. He had gone even though he was still alive, so this brief moment between life and death, there was nobody inside his skull. Most odd," the man pauses, as if lost in thought.

"Did you know," he suddenly starts again, pressing a few buttons on his computer, "that if you drill in _just the right area_ you can cause the subject to not recognize any faces? Press a little further and they won't remember people. Even further and their own name is lost to the wind." Oberhauser smiled at Bond. "Don't you think that would break you, James? If suddenly your darling Q didn't know who you were? I think it would. Which is exactly why I'm going to do it."

Bond can't help himself, he snarls, pulling against his restraints. Fear flashes across Q's face at Oberhauser's words, but the young Quartermaster looks almost immediately resigned to his fate, which makes Bond even angrier.

Another push of a button, and the small contraption moves from the right side of Q's head to the left, the drill starting up again. Q locks eyes with James and mouths the words _'I love you'_ to him, right before the drill hits home behind his ear and Q begins to scream.

After far too long, the drill pulls back out, Q once again slumping as far as his restraints will let him. Bond pulls harder at the ropes binding him, needing to go to Q, needing to see if the love of his life even recognizes him.

Oberhauser stands and pulls a pocket knife out of his pocket, flicking it open. He walks behind James, cutting the agent's wrists free. Bond makes quick work of the ropes on his ankles now that he has use of his hands.

As soon as he's free, he rushes to Q's side. James runs a hand through the Quartermaster's hair, placing another hand on the side of his lover's face. "Q, Q look at me. Are you in there? Q?"

Q's eyelids flutter open, his gaze hazy and unfocused. His eyes dart around for a moment, looking afraid, before settling on James's face. His expression softens. "Hello, love."

Bond's eyes slide closed in relief, and he leans forward, pressing a kiss filled with everything he was feeling to Q's lips. "We'll get through this," the Double-O says when he pulls away slightly. "We can do this. _You_ can do this."

Q nods, masking his fear well. But James knows Q like the back of his hand, and he can see the dread and despair clear as day.

"It didn't work?" Oberhauser pipes up. "Hmm, that's a shame, I guess I'll have to do it again."

"No!" Bond snaps, whirling around, but it's too late, Oberhauser has already pressed the button, the drill is already spinning towards Q's head. James holds his lover as he screams, plotting all the ways he's going to kill Oberhauser.

Suddenly, Bond remembers his watch. He stealthily pulls it off of his wrist, pressing a couple buttons and preparing it to detonate.

The drills retracts, Q's screams cutting off and turning into heavy panting. Tears are streaming silently down his cheeks, and James feels his heart break all over again at the sight.

"Oh, my darling Q," Bond murmurs, stroking Q's cheek. "I'm going to get you out of this." Q leans into James's touch, but when his eyes open, the look he gives James is confused and vaguely uncomfortable, and still very filled with pain.

"Who-who are you?" Q croaks out, his voice rough from screaming.

James freezes, looking down at the love of his life, hating that there was no recognition is those amazing green eyes of his. Bond straightens, realizing he had to slip into professionalism now.

He removes his hands from Q's face and activates his watch, counting down in his head. "Quartermaster, I am Agent James Bond, 007. I'm going to get you out of here, alright?" At the lack of response from Q, James places his hand firmly on the younger man's shoulder. "Nod if you understand, Q." When Q nods, albeit a bit vaguely, James nods curtly back. "Good." And with that Bond turns and tosses the watch at Oberhauser's feet.

Just as the object lands, it explodes, sending Oberhauser flying. The computer blows up, making the metal bands holding Q down snap open.

Bond pulls Q to his feet. "We need to move now, Q. Do you trust me?"

Q looks James over, his eyes narrowed in thought as he examines the agent. "I'm not sure, but you clearly trust me, Agent Bond. We're going to be speaking about this soon, understood?"

James looks at him, his Quartermaster, his Q, his love, the young man who doesn't even know him anymore, and nods. Oh yes, they'll be talking about this later.

* * *

Bond stares at the two-way mirror, arms crossed over his chest. In the room in front of him sits Q, foot tapping nervously against the floor as he waits for someone to walk through the thick, metal door. Every once in a while he glances over at the mirror, knowing it is a two-way mirror and that there is probably someone behind it, but unable to see anyone.

Q's head snaps up as the door _clangs_ open, Gareth Mallory, the new M, stepping through. He looks tired, which, considering the recent events, is understandable. They'd only put Oberhauser into a prison cell (hopefully more secure than Silva's all those months ago) two hours ago after James kept himself from killing the man.

"Hello again, Q," M says, giving what he probably hoped is a reassuring smile as he sits down across from the younger man. "How are you doing?"

Q glances at the mirror again, trying hard to hide his nerves at a unknown possible threat. His foot starts tapping again, having stopped when M had entered the room.

"I'm fine, thank you, but I would really like to get started, if you don't mind skipping the pleasantries," he says with a curt nod. Bond can't help but smirk at Q's words. He might not remember anyone, but he is still the same Q.

M nods back. "Of course, Quartermaster. Now, I know this is probably very frustrating, but try not to be too hard on yourself if you can't remember something, alright?" At Q's nod, M continues. "First, do you recognize me at all?"

Q shakes his head, the space between his eyebrows creasing in the way it did everytime he was annoyed. At himself this time, no doubt. "No, earlier when you escorted me here is my first memory of you."

"Alright," M says, not even pausing. James appreciates the fact that M is being professional. If it had been Moneypenny or Tanner, they probably would have had puppy dog eyes by this point.

"Have you, from the moment you opened your eyes at Oberhauser's compound, recognized a single person? Even if it was just a faint tickle at the back of your mind, it counts."

The young Quartermaster rubs a hand across his face and shakes his head. "No, I haven't. I know that I work for MI6, that my job is Quartermaster. I know that I've worked with many different agents, and that the last M died a few months ago. But the people involved in all of my memories are just blank. I _know_ that the people are supposed to be there, but they're just not."

M is quiet for a minute, seemingly lost in thought. He glances at the window, giving Bond, who he knows is there, a slightly pitying look before turning back to Q. "Alright, well, I'll organize for you to be taken to your apartment. Agents will regularly check in on you to make sure you're alright, but for the most part, you are completely free to never see any of us ever again."

Q's back straightens and his foot stops tapping. "What? You must be joking! No, I will not go and sit in my apartment and twiddle my thumbs while I wait to see if my memory comes back. No, I remember everything there is about MI6, and I can relearn who everyone is. I want to get back to work, M. _Please._ I know how to do my job."

For a few moments, M simply stares at the man across from him, frowning slightly as he thought. Then, slowly, he nods. "Alright, Q. That's actually not a bad idea. Maybe being around all the people you know, all of your friends, will be good for you."

James feels dread settle in his gut. Q would be going back to work, which meant that Bond would have to work with him. Would have to work with him, while Q had no idea who James was. While he didn't know anything about what they were.

What could go wrong?


End file.
